Me too!
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
I need water and some morals
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Randomize
