Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
