The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
That accounts for only three of the penises
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
