I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
