I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
Randomize
