is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Randomize