super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
Randomize
