yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
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