ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
Randomize
