I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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