So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
I knew I had to get an abortion when his toddler sister came up to hug my leg and I kicked her off saying, "Get off, fucker."
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
