Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Randomize
