so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
So much rum. So many feels.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
