I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
