dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
Randomize
