She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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