Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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