i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
you will always have a special place in my vag
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
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