Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
is wine microwaveable?
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Randomize
