Hey man sorry I got all grabby
I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
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