how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
Randomize
