week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
Randomize
