the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
only if we run a train.
done.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Randomize
