I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
