i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
Randomize
