Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
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