Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Randomize
