Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
you tried to scramble eggs in my dryer last night. i want you here in 15 minutes to clean this shit up
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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