summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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