Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
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