I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
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