and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Randomize
