what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Randomize
