Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
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