he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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