Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Randomize
