I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
Randomize
