im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
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