Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
My unemployment check should really just be direct-deposited into the checking account of my drug dealer
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
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