So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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