Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
