Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
I need to calm my uterus...
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
