Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
Randomize
