i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
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