so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
where does the pee come out of this thing
how do flat chested girls get laid?
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
Randomize
