let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
Randomize
