Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Randomize
