I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
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