What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
Randomize
