And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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